Judge Russell (CNO), Texas Indian Bar, in academic exile at Indiana, sent this to Triballaw.
THE NEW 2004 CALIFORNIA STATE EMPLOYEE GIRLY-MEN HANDBOOK
by ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGERSICK DAYS We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.
PERSONAL DAYS Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year. They are called Saturday & Sunday.
LUNCH BREAK Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch as they need to eat more, so that they can look healthy. Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get balanced meal to maintain their average figure. Fat people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's all the time needed to drinka Slim Fast.
DRESS CODE It is advised that you come to work dressed according to your salary. If we see you wearing $350 Prada sneakers, and carrying a $600 Gucci Bag, we assume you are doing well financially and therefore you do not need a raise. If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes, and therefore you do not need a raise. If you dress in-between, you are right where you need to be and therefore you do not need a raise.
BEREAVEMENT LEAVE This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing you can do for dead friends, relatives, or coworkers. Every effort should be made to have no employees^Mattend to the arrangements. In rare cases where employee involvement is necessary funeral should be schedule in the late afternoon. We will be glad to allow you to work through your lunch hour and subsequently leave that much earlier.
RESTROOM USE Entirely too much time is being spent in the restroom. There is now a strict 3 minute time limit in the stalls. At the end of three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall door will open and a picture will betaken. After your second offense, your picture will be posted on the company bulletin board under "Chronic Offenders."
Thank you for your loyalty to our great state. We are here to provide a positive employment experience.
s/THE GOVERNATER
If you think this is a hoot, you ought to see "The Night Before Christmas" translated into "ebonics". Go to site and click on humor section.
Posted by: Steve Plonk at September 27, 2004 06:38 PMSteve,
I'm not in a position to comment on North American African language. I am in a position to comment on some few North American Indian languages, and jargons. I fully support the recovery of Chinnok Jargon, fully as in having sent Chinnok Jargon texts to the Recovery Community. Chinnok-J is historically important as the linguistic expression of regional political affiliations, pre-contact, contact, and conquest. Its restoration a century after conquest is not simply an academic exercise. Mobilian recovery has been discussed too.
Cheers.
Posted by: Eric at September 27, 2004 09:00 PM